I have a confession to make. When I was in a job I didn’t love, I shopped for the week. I bought new clothes to make myself feel better. Instead of being honest with myself I used retail therapy to justify my choice to stay. Shopping became my motivation.

A new outfit made me feel good and helped me get through the day. Sounds pathetic right? Seeking pleasure in material things was an unhealthy pattern. I eventually left the job and my shopping addiction subsided.

I thankfully no longer substitute spending money for real happiness.

It’s very easy to use spending as a way to solve personal and/or financial problems. Debt can be used as motivation to keep you stuck in a job you don’t love or a relationship that doesn’t serve you anymore. Debt can help you achieve a certain lifestyle beyond your means and accomplish personal goals. It can also become a bad habit and make you a victim of a vicious cycle.

I was recently speaking with a friend about her debt. She pays $600 in interest on four credit cards and is only making the minimum payment. My first thought was “that’s $600/mo she could be putting towards her actual debt, retirement and investing”.

I suggested she get a 21 month zero interest credit card and use that same $600 to pay off her debt in the 21 months. Unfortunately, she has poor credit and is maxed out on all of her cards and can’t get another credit card.

As we started to dig deeper I realized the only way my friend is going to get out of her debt is if she chooses to;

There are a lot of benefits to having one parent stay at home. When you make the decision to sacrifice that additional income it doesn’t mean you should stop saving for retirement.

In 2015, Transamerica found 75 percent of homemakers believe that their spouse or partner’s income will be “very” or “extremely” important to them in retirement. Even if you and your partner’s subscribe to the “our money” concept, life happens. Divorce, disability and death can all leave you in an uncomfortable position later on in life.

Taking time out of the workforce to care for children is a big decision that can leave many women at risk of not achieving a financially secure retirement. Many stay at home mom’s end up with fewer lifetime earnings, savings and retirement benefits.

There shouldn’t be a cost for staying home to care for your children. Here are a few ways you can contribute toward retirement as a stay at home mom.

A boost in your pay would be nice, wouldn’t it? Part of building wealth is knowing your worth and asking for more. It can be difficult to talk about money and ask for a raise. If you’re ready to convince your boss you deserve a raise you’re going to need a few points to use for negotiating that increase in salary or pay.

If you’re feeling like it’s been a long time since you’ve had a raise and you want more money you need to stop and ask yourself a few questions first.